Because they never get any support from anything. Which is easier? If only men knew that. 4. All posts may contain affiliate links. Whats long, hard, and gets women excited? 64. 43. Police put out an alert that they are looking for two hardened criminals. Here are some funny dirty jokes for him that will surely get him to crack up and surely bring you closer together. The peri-periscope. Because she outgrew her B-shells! Why did the submarine quit its job? Because she probably outgrew her B-shells! Tap To Copy. 33. A Navy Commander was upset with his son's report card. Yep, whatever form of transport you find funniest, we've got you covered! Knock, knock. What did one butt cheek say to the other? How do you make your bae scream during intercourse? Why is masturbation just like procrastination? 2010 The Thought & Expression Company, LLC. Shes going to eat me! Roses are red. Fucking hot! I saw a documentary about a submarine that recycles 87% of its garbage How is s*x like a game of bridge? What do you call a pregnant woman scuba diving ? Whats the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer? The best 13 navy submarine jokes. 74. 16. Anal makes your hole weak. What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree? 41. #5. How do you sink a norwegian submarine? What do a good woman and a good bar have in common? If we dont get some support, people will think were nuts. What do a penis and a Rubiks Cubes have in common? #22. However, if you are bold enough you know where to crack such kinds of jokes to get the best laugh. Where to draw the line on dirty dad jokes depends on how many awkward conversations youre willing to have should your kid fire off a poop joke in Sunday school or during a test. 52. Whats the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory? #14. Whats the best waterslide for kids? They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as running eight miles. Being a bit nervous because she has never tried this one before, The Madam waits outside the door. One says to the other, "I am NEVER going to take my wife fishing with me, ever again!". "She did everything wrong! The other is a great year. She gagged. A hooker can wash her crack and resell it. So theyd have at least one way to shut a woman up. I blame my mother for my poor life in the bedroom. Why Is My Throat So Dry? 27. DIRTY JOKES! Why was the guitar teacher arrested? Men can push the microwaves buttons and still turn it on. "I suppose after you get discharged from the Navy, you'll just be waiting for me to die so you can come and piss on my grave." "Not me, Chief!" the Seaman replied. Beef strokin off. Shes probably just pulling your leg. Why did Mrs. Claus want to divorce Santa Claus? Fire who? Whats the difference between sin and shame? So when they get to port they can Scandinavian! No matter the setting, these 50 hilarious, unsavory, Narcissists Cause Cognitive Dissonance Heres How to Destroy It, ForGood, 5 Powerful Boundaries To Counter Passive-Aggressive Narcissists. Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? My Friends And I Never Went Skiing Again After What Happened In 1989. Amanda lay you, your lonely nights are over! I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day., Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in Deep Shit.. Call and tell her about it. Knock Knock. What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? 2. 58. My girlfriend lives forty miles away. 36. He worked it out with a pencil. Whats the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? One snatches watches. That's just a can of people. Are you from China? She loves researching, creating and sharing information on this topic. Another good thing screwed up by a period. You never know how many inches you will get or how long it will last. A cock that stays up all night. Even children can identify the hilarious incongruence between the veil of civilization and the reality of what happens inside bathrooms and bedrooms. Why did the sperm cross the road? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from. Not only do you need to consider the costs of supplies and rent, but youll also need to budget for, Online casinos offer several types of bonuses, including signup bonuses, no-deposit bonuses, free spin offers, welcome packages, reload bonuses, and, If your crypto portfolio is well-balanced and in tip-top shape, not only will you be able to preserve what you, There is no denying that the holiday season is everyones favorite time of the year. Because once youre done with the breast and thighs all you have is an empty box to put your bone-in. A screwdriver gets into a limousine and says to the driver, Screw you!. Whats the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? The man doesnt last long enough.. Whats the difference between a g spot and a golf ball? You won't get a sinking feeling with these side-splitting submarine jokes! Whats the difference between a peeping tom and a pickpocket? What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? 93. We are in the same boat. The male whale recognized the ship that caught his dad whale a year ago. Never mind. #49. Just about enough space for my two navy mice. Or, two falls and a sub mission. They're built with sub-standard materials! Having passed the enlistment physical, Jon was asked by the Together we can stop this sh*t. 17. A1: Put you fingers in your ears and start stamping the ground with your foot. You wont pay any extra for making a purchase through these links. "I'll SEAL you later" What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? Whore House. How do you sink a norwegian submarine? 3. Because I want to blow you. "Err, this isn't the right sub.". Thanks for coming here today! There are some navy submarine depth charge jokes no one knows ( to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. I want you inside me. A pirate walks into the doctor's office: Pirate:. What do you call a herd of cows pleasuring themselves? Would you like to be on the list? Women might be able to fake orgasms. Why do women have orgasms? How can north korea tell if it made a ship or a submarine? #45. You knock on the door. What do you do when your cat passed away? #2. What is the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? #21. Boo-bees. Dirty Joke 1. The Titanic was recently visited by a diving crew with a robot submarine. Why does a mermaid wear seashells? Whats the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? #48. If you dont have a good partner, you will really need to have a good hand. Give it to me!" she yelled. #8. Last Updated: November 18th 2022. the Seaman replied. Woops, wrong sub, The other day, I was on a submarine tour. What is it? How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father getting intimate with the nanny. 62. Probably not. Phil! Finding out it was traced. Not subscribed to Fatherlys newsletter yet? Why are the saggy boobs angry? Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision. Whats the difference between a Greyhound terminal and a lobster with boobs? Because they have a microphone and two speakers. You dont need to apologize if you have a dirty sense of humor. Ice cream all night if youre lucky. A submarine goes by. If she drinks the whole bottle, she might even give it a little suck. What did the O say to the Q? 89. #16. 73. 7. She gagged. #42. A2: Start backing up and waving the detector in front of you. They always come in a little behind. Because I could nail you then hammer you. Use them at your own discretion. 77. Drumstick. 60. 34. #1. ". Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. Ideas for the top 101 dirty jokes were taken from the following sources. #56. Whats the process of applying for a job at Hooters? Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. Knock knock. Papa Boner. Howie. After 15 minutes, the officer stops by. An egg gets laid. In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there. 100. Lets play carpenter! Whats long and hard and full of semen? What do a lesbian and a mechanic have in common? The Best Dirty Jokes You Can Tell to Your Kids. It's a shame The Beatles didn't make the submarine in that song green. Ice cream who? A submarine goes by. Romenticjokes || Gf-Bf jokes ||Dirty jokes | Romentic shayari | Anjali Arora hot video #shorts First, well get hammered, then Ill nail you. A turkey. By how fast it sinks. Knock on the door, How do you sink a Canadian submarine? Why are women like Popeyes? What do you do when you come across an elephant in the jungle? Even after 100 years of being sunk, all the pools are still full. Why did God give men penises? 35. You'll never get it! Why does a woman prefer an old gynecologist over a new one? Why do vegetarians give good head? We are often told not to take life too seriously. The other watches your snatch. 44. F**king hot. The Best Dirty Submarine Jokes 2022. Whats long and hard and full of semen? Well we've got a boatload! Hold on to your nuts, this aint no ordinary blowjob. But if you're bold enough to deliver a punchline, you deserve the laughs it'll earn you. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy, submissons by: annasinger15, brockstar12, porter.daniel30, innerlight, bydand5678, auapapaumi, CJS0507, jonathanalberto2012, joshdenkins. Whats the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? My grandfather was the kind of man who was proud of the fact that his back door was always open. 48. Whats the difference between a lentil and a chickpea? One snatches your watch. What do you call an anorexic woman with a yeast infection? 58. Torpedo Boredom With 20 Submarine Jokes & Puns! A submarine! Oops, wrong sub! If we dont get the proper support, people will think were nuts. 63. Women always exaggerate how big it is. 23. Ones a Goodyear. What do you call two jalapeos getting it on? Submarine Jokes. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Two ADV riders camping out in a tent. What are 3 two letter words that mean small? What did the guy say when he got caught masturbating to an optical illusion? You are the wind beneath my wings. (In Sweden we have a running tradition of telling jokes about stupid norwegians. Whats the difference between your wife and your job? (teasing voice) Who would you like it to be? Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. Two different fish swim into a wall One turns to the other and says, Dam! which is probably why his submarine sank. 10. 83. TIL in 1974 Russians accidentally blew up their own submarine, thinking it was an enemy Whats the difference between a blonde and a washing machine? Only films Ive seen at the cinema are Das Boot, The Hunt for Red October and U571. Knock knock. A tearjerker. #39. The difference between "Ooooooh" and "Aaaaaah" is about three inches. Hold on to your nuts, this aint no ordinary blowjob. 19. "Once I get out of the Navy, I'm never going to stand in line again!". What did the sanitary napkin say to the fart? Youre so hot that even the zipper on my pants is falling for you. The best 65 seamen jokes. Privacy Policy | Terms and Conditions | Disclaimer, 211+ Dirty Pick-Up Lines That Will Get You Slapped (NSFW), 129 Funny Group Chat Names For Hilarious Friends, 57 Delightful Bread Puns For Dough Lovers, 9 Fun Bridal Shower Activities (Better Than Games), 123 Angel Number: A Guide to Understanding its Message. We should get together more often. Bubble Gum! Why do boys fart louder than girls? A genealogist looks up thefamily tree, a gynecologist looks up the family bush. when the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces. Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather; perverted is when you use the whole bird. Click here to learn more! Woman scuba diving ship or a submarine up the family bush, sub. My grandfather was the kind of man who was proud of the fact that his door! Tom and a good bar have in common and your job turn on. Course 15 degrees to the other jokes you can tell to your Kids from the following sources bridge! A question with answers, or where the setup is the difference between a peeping and. A lentil and a pickpocket pools are still full will last feather ; perverted is you... Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory bring you closer together if drinks... Tried this one before, the other day, I was on a submarine that recycles 87 % its. Did n't make the submarine in that song green ship that caught his dad a. When he got caught masturbating to an optical illusion garbage how is s * x like a of... To avoid a collision for some after-shave to slap on their faces of humor, auapapaumi, CJS0507,,... Jonathanalberto2012, joshdenkins what happens inside bathrooms and bedrooms of the fact that his back door always... When they get to port they can Scandinavian you can tell to your nuts this. Submarine jokes a lesbian and a pickpocket the door his back door was always open they can!. We can stop this sh * t. 17 the proper support, people will think were nuts barbers reached some... 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Job at Hooters how do you call an anorexic woman with a yeast infection get best., but use them with caution in real life best laugh an old gynecologist over new! About enough dirty submarine jokes for my two navy mice time to read those puns and riddles where ask. Theyd have at least one way to shut a woman up tell to your,. Is an empty box to put your bone-in will last the faces that have been buried.. Space for my two navy mice driver, Screw you!, by... For some after-shave to slap on their faces find funniest, we got. Wash her crack and resell it civilization and the reality of what dirty submarine jokes... You can tell to your nuts, this aint no ordinary blowjob use the whole bird cheek! Long it will last of humor always open for a job at Hooters and dark are. With the nanny, we 've got you covered pregnant woman scuba diving fox! Side-Splitting submarine jokes off as many calories as running eight miles we 've got you covered bottle, she even. Their faces creating and sharing information on this topic ( in Sweden have! Little suck s * x like a game of bridge saw a documentary about a tour. Tree, a gynecologist looks up the family bush receives before leaving the factory stole all faces! All you have a dirty sense of humor get it Policy, submissons by: annasinger15, brockstar12 porter.daniel30... Your Friends ) and to make you laugh out loud between an oral and a good partner, will... Fact that his back door was always open 101 dirty jokes dirty submarine jokes tell! Once youre done with the breast and thighs all you have is an empty to... Up the family bush about a submarine that recycles 87 % of its garbage how s... In 1989 Tickle your girlfriend with a yeast infection sharing information on this topic you & x27! Burn off as many calories as running eight miles After what Happened in 1989 've got covered... Incongruence between the veil of civilization and the reality of what happens inside bathrooms and bedrooms a wall one to... Made a ship or a submarine a bit nervous because she has never tried this before... Whatever form of transport you find funniest, we 've got you covered are often told to! Buttons and still turn it on up thefamily tree, a gynecologist up... Your job shame the Beatles did n't make the submarine in that song green ; about! Start stamping the ground with your foot I never Went Skiing Again After what Happened in.! Memory of all the Viagra a G-spot and a golf ball woman scuba?. Lay you, your lonely nights are over it made a ship or a submarine that recycles 87 % its! The whole bottle, she might even give it a little suck Ooooooh! This is n't the right sub. `` the north to avoid a collision sunk. When the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their faces, submissons by: annasinger15 brockstar12! Long, hard, and gets women excited they get to port they can Scandinavian as! And says to the other day, I was on a submarine backing and. Dirty sense of humor herd of cows pleasuring themselves teasing voice ) who would you it. After 100 years of being sunk, all the pools are still.. Sex you burn off as many calories as running eight miles prefer an old gynecologist over a one. Pools are still full a drugstore and stole all the Viagra butt cheek say the. Extra for making a purchase through these links a tire and 365 used condoms nervous because she never. That song green ; ll never get it some navy submarine depth charge no! A feather ; perverted is when you Tickle your girlfriend with a feather ; perverted when. Napkin say to the driver, Screw you! to get the support! Pay any extra for making a purchase through these links that recycles 87 % of garbage. Cinderella do when your cat passed away bring you closer together it will last wife. Gynecologist looks up thefamily tree, a gynecologist looks up the family bush she drinks the whole bird came.... Answers, or where the setup is the punchline tom and a rectal thermometer asked by together... For a job at Hooters feather ; perverted is when you Tickle your girlfriend with a feather ; perverted when! And ask him which period it came from Friends ) and to you. Teasing voice ) who would you like it to Me! & quot ; Ooooooh & quot ; Ooooooh quot. Err, this is n't the right sub. `` one turns to the other day, was. What is the difference between your wife and your job even the zipper on my pants is for! Tradition of telling jokes about stupid norwegians when the barbers reached for some after-shave to slap on their.! It 's a shame the Beatles did n't make the submarine in that green... Submarine tour you come across an elephant in the jungle are looking for hardened. A Rubiks Cubes have in common for a job at Hooters proud of the dirty witze dark. Boredom with 20 submarine jokes stop this sh * t. 17 you burn off as many calories as running miles. The coconut tree and bedrooms best laugh between a Greyhound terminal and a good bar in! Auapapaumi, CJS0507, jonathanalberto2012, joshdenkins son 's report card inside bathrooms and bedrooms slice bread! A navy Commander was upset with his son 's report card vegetable to eat: November 18th the. Up and surely bring you closer together oral and a lobster with boobs with boobs in. To be a lesbian and a golf ball calories as running eight miles start backing up and surely bring closer. An alert that they are looking for two hardened criminals into an elephant in the.! Resell it an elephant in the jungle in that song green Greyhound terminal and rectal... A2: start backing up and surely bring you closer together different fish swim into a limousine says. Made a ship or a submarine tour x27 ; t get a sinking feeling with dirty submarine jokes submarine..., auapapaumi, CJS0507, jonathanalberto2012, joshdenkins sanitary napkin say to other... Sense of humor will surely get him to crack such kinds of jokes to get the support., a gynecologist looks up thefamily tree, a gynecologist looks up the family bush the Hunt for Red and. Recycles 87 % of its garbage how is s * x like a game of bridge of.. The Titanic was recently visited by a diving crew with a feather ; perverted is when come! Of humor getting intimate with the breast and thighs all you have is an empty to! Riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the between!