This directly or indirectly can alter our views on other minds. WebIf someone is a condescending jerk, you have every right to excuse yourself and put distance between you. Whether its their tone of voice or belittling comments they have made, dealing with condescending people can be challenging. So dont take everything they say as an insult. If people are regularly condescending towards you, there may be a reason. But the problem with being aggressive is that you might end up looking like the same kind of person they are, and thats what they want. sure, cool story, Im definitely listening. Using I statements. 10. Were committed to providing the world with free how-to resources, and even $1 helps us in our mission. You should feel like you have the option to say no or share your opinion and still be respected for your decision. (& What To Do). Its currently playing on The Vessel (one of our partners) but only for a limited time. If you know someone who has a habit of putting people down with condescending remarks, hopefully, the comebacks below will equip you with all the ammo you need to fire back and put them in their place! Calmly and professionally call out the patronizing person without making a scene or being dramatic by pointedly yet politely saying, Gee, that comment sounded a bit condescending to me. Condescending people dont know how theyre coming across and they can be very manipulative. That will damage their ego and make them feel less superior. Condescending people fail to read the room and have problems deciding what is appropriate to say. If the consensus is that a certain person is hell to be around, stage an intervention. In every peer group. WebThe opposite of being condescending is being respectful. If were respectful of somebody, it means were treating them with the utmost respect and not doing anything that might cause them upset or harm. If someone talks down to you but says something true, you can seize upon that and draw from what you know to turn the talk in another direction. Do you need directions or are you good to go?. Hopefully, you found one or more comeback lines from this article that you will be able to use next time you find yourself on the receiving end of a condescending remark. Even if they did something wrong, they wont apologize because it will make them look stupid and inferior. How do you respond to a condescending coworker? Thanks for sharing your point of view, it was very insightful. ), My Roommate Has No Friends! It indicates a human with a complex flavor profile. They want to show everyone that theyre better than the rest because deep down they actually feel inferior toward others. So if you can look like you agree with them, then that will disarm them and youll be more easily able to express your real opinions later on in the conversation. They might try to explain themselves, but if they refuse to acknowledge their patronizing tone or language, you dont owe them an ear. "Entertain me." They may be scared of losing you so make you feel small, so you think they are your only option. WebThe best way to deal with a condescending coworker is to ignore them. They will always be looking for a way to prove how right they are and how wrong the other person is. WebWitty or Smart Comebacks for Condescending Remarks. Condescending people love to talk about their own achievements because they want the attention and recognition for doing those things. Required fields are marked *. Its a must-watch and we couldnt recommend it more highly. Because then they will be admitting that someone can achieve things that they cant. A need to feel powerful or important can also lead to condescension. And we end up caring about what others think of us rather than focusing on what we need at a more fundamental level. Theyll temporarily lower their ego if they apologize. You know this is just something they do maybe because thats the way theyre used to talking to others. Now you know what to say when someone talks down to you. What Are the Signs of Condescending Behavior? Sometimes deciding if a person is actually being condescending or if its all in your head is difficult. Some will no doubt sound familiar. If a colleague or a superior is talking down to you, report them to Human Resources so the pattern of behavior can be documented and addressed. My understanding is that condescending people dont know that theyre being condescending, is that true? Theyre so focused on what they need and what they want that they cant get out of their own way. Hand them their pink slip and move on. Don't forget that. They may also be dismissive of other peoples opinions and feelings, not taking the time to understand how others feel before making decisions for them. 11. Do it right, and any witnesses to the insult will be more interested in what you add to it. Sometimes you dont want to be harsh or risk offending the person being condescending, I get it. But the responses given here will have a stronger and more satisfying effect. They might say something like you know that already or its so easy. In every family. Or someone speaking to a co-worker as if theyre beneath them and do not understand what theyre doing when theyre equal and understand perfectly what to do. WebUse humor to defuse a difficult person. What better way to illustrate how someone is making you feel than to mirror their actions back to them? If the intent of their statement was sharp, this would dull it in a jiffy. It can be incredibly hurtful and upsetting being on the end of condescending or patronizing remarks. Being condescending is similar to being passive-aggressive in a lot of ways. So you want to know how to offend everyone or even avoid doing this. Its easy to get defensive when you are dealing with difficult people. That will just make them angry and youll have a harder time trying to resolve the situation. They always act like their opinion is the best, and their ideas are the most creative. 6. Jessica is trained in the Imago technique and the Gottman method for couples therapy. If you are having trouble establishing those all-important boundaries with the bad actors in your life, you should seek professional help. 1. This word shows that you dislike people like this. They want to be seen as superior, but they really just want someone to see them as a good person. WebWhen communicating with a condescending person, pause for a moment. A person who is condescending in their comments toward others often: 1) wants to win the discussion, usually by squelching any dissent. Responding with an outburst of your own will only inflame the situation. People who are condescending tend to be more stubborn than most people. If you to want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Twitter or Facebook. Find a public place to meet and let them know you don't appreciate their comments. If they try to laugh it off as a joke that youre not getting, maintain the cool composure. If someone is talking down to you to make you feel small or to get a laugh, it says nothing about you but plenty about them (and nothing good). In every family. [3] For example, if they are trying to get you to agree with them, say, I disagree or Id like you to stop asking me now. 4 Practice self-care. They interrupt you when you are speaking to correct things like your pronunciation or recollections. One of the worst things you can do when dealing with condescending people is to lose your composure with them. After all, if they admit their mistakes then theyll admit to being inferior in some way. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. Above all, do not stoop to their level; remain composed and stay focused on finding common ground. If all else fails, use sarcasm and irony to make light of their superiority complex and let them know that you dont take them seriously. If youre dealing with a condescending coworker, it might also be a good idea to talk with your boss about it. Oftentimes, Condescension is often rooted in feelings of superiority or arrogance and can be caused by insecurity or a lack of confidence in oneself. Condescending people like to brag about everything that theyve done in their lives and how much smarter and more intelligent than everyone else, even people who are a lot more successful than them. Its also not always completely obvious when someone is doing it, at least not deliberately. 7. Here, have a breath mint. Witty or Smart Comebacks for Condescending Remarks. If youre upset about something, they might tell you its not a big deal and tell you to move on. A testimony in two stages which has accumulated 5.8 million views on the platform. You can address bad office behavior by telling people when their actions are not OK with you. To help you recollect those moments, here are a few maddening examples of talking down to someone: Now, make your own list of examples from your own experience. Dont talk to me that way. People who dont usually say hurtful things are more likely to do so when theyre in pain. 2023byTango Publishing Corporation All Rights Reserved. This is because deep down, they are actually very insecure. She is a member of the International Board of Coaches and Practitioners (IBCP). Surprise me by saying something intelligent next time. spastic adjective. Id slap you, but that could be classed as animal abuse. Put distance between you and the bully. A condescending remark is often meant to put the person in their place, but it can be hurtful and unwelcome. Treating someone with condescension is the opposite of treating them with respect. I heard you say something, but chose to ignore it. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. I could give you a nasty look, but I see you already have one. I bet you have been insulted by a condescending idiot and want to know how to return the insult. I have some breath mints if you want one. Theyre not going to do that. If you get angry, then theyll think that theyre right and that no one else understands them. 9. You want to remember your response with a smile and with peace of mind. This is why we partnered with Rud Iand to produce a free masterclass on transforming our relationships through the practice of self-love. The problem is that condescending people are defensive by nature. In this post, we will figure out why they do this and what can be done about it. As an active listener, you might respond to a condescending remark by asking them how they are or whether everything is okay. No matter what the cause, speaking condescendingly to others is unacceptable and should be avoided at all costs. A condescending person might say something like, Well, I would agree with you, but then wed both be wrong., Say something like, Hey, what did you mean when you said that I probably wouldnt understand that joke?, Try something like, You said Id tell you this joke, but I dont think youd understand it. Do you think that Im not smart enough to get your jokes?, You might say something like, What you said was pretty condescending. Wow! Theres no harm in calmly and directly saying, Dont talk down to me. In effect, youre letting them know youve noticed their condescending approach, and youre not letting them get away with it. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Dont give them the satisfaction. They like to boast about themselves and their achievements. People who speak condescendingly to others are often those who feel superior in some way. Condescending people are, by their very nature, insulting. If you dont want to dignify their comment with a verbal response, sometimes the best response is to walk away, whether theyre still talking or not. 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